Drive your Karma

Curb your Dogma

Swami Beyondananda's Guidelines for Enlightenment

1) Be a fundamentalist- make sure the fun always comes before the mental.

Realize that life is a situation comedy that never gets cancelled.

A laugh track is provided, and the reason we are put in the material world is to get more material.

Have a good laughsAtive twice a day and it will insure regularHilarity

2) Remember each one of us has been given a special gift- just for entering.

So you are already a winner.

3) The most powerful tool on the planet is Tel-A-Vision

I tell a vision to you and you tell a vision to me,

that way if we don't like the programming we can always change the channel

4) Life is like photography..you use the negative to develop.

And no matter what adversity you face be re-assured, Of course god loves you..

he's just not ready to commit.

5) As we go thru life thinking heavy thoughts the thought particles tend to get caught between your ears, causing a condition called *truth decay*

So be sure to mental floss at least twice a day.

and when you are tempted to practice tantrum yoga, remember what we teach in Sawami's Absurdiveness Class..

"Don't get even..Get odd."

6) If we want world peace we must let go of our attachments and become nomads.

I no mad at you..

you no mad at me.

Surely then there will be no madness on the planet?

A little peace here..a little peace there, then suddenly all the peaces fit to make one BIG peace.

7) Great earth changes are predicted..

So if you are looking to avoid earthquakes, the advice is simple..

When you find a fault..don't dwell on it.

8) There's no need to change the world..simply toilet train it..then you never have to change it again.

9) If you are looking to *find the key to the universe* I have some good news and some bad news.

the bad news is: there is no key

the good news is: it was left unlocked..

10) Finally, Everything I told you was chanelled..That way if you don't like it, it's not my fault..

Enlightment is not a buraucacy..So you don't need to go thru *channels*

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE

Protect this planet

it's the only one we have.